Why did they have to do this to me?! McDonald’s is now serving breakfast, all day long. 24/7. This is a problem.
I am an avowed foodie. I can hear the Big Irishman, light of my life, hubby, ball and chain, howling in the background. Ok, maybe that’s an understatement. Ok, I admit I’m a food snob. Fast food for me is pasta tossed with olive oil, garlic and broccoli rabe.
I am that annoying car holding up the line because I have no idea what’s on the menu. Who knew there were so many choices? Ok, I admit, I love McDonald’s French fries but they’re not an obsession.
Although I may not break for French fries, I’m a fool for a McDonald’s breakfast sandwich. Specifically, a sausage, egg and cheese BISCUIT. If you never ate one, you are, in a word, DEPRIVED. If you have you probably experienced that gut dropping feeling when you madly drive up to the take out window at 11:02 only to be told by some bored disembodied voice that, breakfast is no longer being served.
The no breakfast after 11 am was always a hard and fast rule. But now the rules have changed.
Fortunately the closest McDonald’s is 9.6 miles from home. But I’m by no means safe.
Today, suddenly and without warning, to use a clichéd but appropriate legal expression, I couldn’t resist the urge. At the crack of 8am, I had to have it. You all have been there too, obsessing over something that you just had to have.
The car glided into the line as if on auto pilot.
“Sausage, egg and cheese on a biscuit.” I rattled it off faster than the pros who order by number.
“Do you want to make that a meal?” The cheerful voice offered, obviously sharing my joy that breakfast is now an all-day affair.
I paused since I hadn’t contemplated anything other than the buttery biscuit layered with a spicy breakfast sausage patty, egg and cheese.
“Ma’am the meal comes with hash browns and a drink.” The voice sensed that she was not dealing with a fast food aficionado.
“Ugh, absolutely not! Those hash browns, will kill you.”
While scrutinizing the menu board I noticed that the biscuit was not featured on the all-day breakfast banner. So I asked.
“Do you serve the biscuit all day or just the McMuffin?
“This location only serves the biscuit until 11am.”
The lure of a 24/7 biscuit dissipated.
“Fantastic!” I sang out.
The voice was silent. No doubt she’s heard it all.
There are other McDonald’s but fortunately they’re farther away and every obsession has its limits.
There’d be no midnight biscuit runs after all.
I breathed a sigh of relief and thoroughly enjoyed my Happy Meal.